Friday, November 11, 2005

Life Expectancy of a VICE Marketing Maven

Smarter Kids May Live Longer

A new study which followed elderly adults deemed gifted by childhood IQ tests, found that the higher their early IQs were, the longer they lived -- up to a point, at least. The survival advantage began to plateau after a childhood IQ of 163, an intelligence level few people reach.

If this conclusion is to be believed the Murse will be the first VICE marketing cat pushing up daiseys and talking the long downhill walk. Though it is assumed that LaWow's cholesterol is higher than a Georgian Pine.And I think we can all agree that the day can not come too soon. The rest of the pack will be tested asap so we can book accordingly for future advertising cycles. Prospective advertisers would be wise to ask for their AdRep's IQ score so as to ensure as long and as fruity, I mean fruitful, a relationship as possible.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, Jesus. How do I find out if my contact is the Murse or not? Can you please post a legend or scorecard so that we the home viwers know who you are talking about? And who will have these IQ tests scores LaVoie?

Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman said...

Contact ryand@viceland.com if you want to advertise. He is cuter and sleeps more than the rest and that means there is less time to spend everyday hopped up on bennies or drowning in suds so in turn he should live the longest. Plus he is pretty smart I think.

 

the running mule

the running mule