Oh The Carnage

VICE Superhero Derrick Beckles rolls into New York tonite from his Toronto stomping grounds. The TV Carnage impresario has been cast as the lead in a VICE Films -produced anti-smoking documentary. This particularly fine-looking black man is obsessed with absurdity and his ability to track the most trivially inspid moments on television --like this pathetic bit on the dangers of moshing -- is unmatched, unchartered and unbelievable. And by the way, wasn't slam dancing a fine name to begin with? Moshing? WTF? Fucking marketing guys! But Beckles is much more than a compiler of clips and shorts, he is a man of action and TV Carnage is his first love, his white whale, his quest for fire. The guarantee is that someday, if you are lucky enough to run into him, you will either be oblivious to what he is talking about, deafened by his carnivalesque laughter, or be thoroughly embarassed that you hadn't prepped better. But if, however, you fall off a waterfall and need a motherfucker to throw you a rope,who you gonna call?