Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Beer Babes

Whenever you go to a party you should always look for the chicks drinking beer first. They are easier to deal with and more fun than girls who insist upon drinking premium vodka. (The only exception is if the vodka is being consumed as Jello shots. Just count to 10, throw these babes on your shoulder--one on each--and lurch back to your cave.) In general, beer drinkers eat less healthier than wine drinkers, so buying her dinner will cost a fraction. Plus, how dazzling do they look when backdropped with cases upon cases of PBR? Beer drinking from bottles or cans is preferred, or cups only in the case of a kegger. However, if your mark has poured her beer from the bottle into a cup, best to steer clear. Too much maintenance already, and you know she is the type who travels with three knock-off Burberry roller suitcases instead of just a toothbrush. Girls who are pouring the beer from the keg are worth their weight in gold. Chances are, she'll be up for bringing you coffee in bed.

7 comments:

Jeffro said...

Hey Mr. Gossip, How did you get this here screen capture of a dream I had?

ElSchwab said...

Mr. Mule, I'll give you a case of Old Style if you'll tell her your friend likes her. Is that a Swatch she's sporting? Swatches and PBR make my watch and beer pants go crazy.

Anonymous said...

that was a good party, VICE!

john said...

i love beer bitches

Anonymous said...

box on box action!

nick said...

white girls.

Anonymous said...

isn't that the chick helping the guy to stay awake in the Vice Guide to Austin? What a fox.

 

the running mule

the running mule