Thumbs Up to Big Butts

Like chocolate flavored manna from the gods, the news out of Harvard Medical School that ass fat might be a key component to overall health had chubby girls the world over rejoicing. Specifically, the copious quantities of subcutaneous fat found in a big ass seem to help fight diabetes.

While dietary carte blanche is nice news to the Lane Bryant set it's never been a worry in Jamaican dance halls or University cafeterias where the "freshmen fifteen" has been packing asses into ever tighter jeans for generations. So gals you are free to let out the waistband, supersize your caloric intake and prepare for a long life but know that until waifish supermodels start having their twigs amputated due to diabetes, most of us will stick with the the tried and true trim line. They're just easier to pedal home from the bar on the back of your bicycle.

In the interest of science here are the prototypes for a healthy big ole butt and all you chubby males out there remember, "You can't drive a rail spike with a tack hammer."